It looks like the whole “go woke and go broke” thing is really starting to hit poor Disney. After losing 2.4 billion dollars last week in an alarming story, it’s shareholders are going nuts.
Now it looks like the owners of the third largest standing Navy on Earth with over 100 vessels, Carnival Cruise lines, is set to clean up even more. Disney, desperately attempting to clean up it’s flagging business, has “suspended” all cruise lines for the near future.
While the corporation’s losses have perfectly reasonable seasonal explanations, the conservative boycott and pressure from Governor Ron DeSandick certainly play a role. Sandy Batt, head of Groomer Punishment at CPAC had a brief statement to make to anyone standing in her skate park rain runoff ditch.
“They used to call conservatives names, saying that we’re backwards, unintelligent, passe, or just plain stupid. Well who’s retarding now? Disney is. We’ve defeated the dragon with our swords made of pension checks. Hey, that would make a good movie.”
It’s estimated that Disney’s losses due to that retardery number in over the seventy-five dollar mark. That’s no small potatoes. That’s 15 2-pound bags of Sour Patch Kids.
What’s next for Disney? Mickey Mouse hats replaced with pussy caps? Doctor Strange entering the Multiverse of Ad Revenue? Indiana Jones begging for cash in the street?