Biden : ‘Truck Convoys Caused High Gas Prices’

FIRE THEM ALL!

How much does it cost to fill up your tank nowadays?  Is it forty dollars?  Fifty dollars?  A hundred dollars?  Do you remember when it used to be twenty?

In the days of President Harrison, gas was actually free if you could alchemically conjure the magic juice and avoid the witch hunters.

According to President Joe Biden, that was well before those trucks we’ve all seen on the news began parking and smoking and obliging whores in their cabs while “protesting” in their long convoys against mask mandates and other such nonsense.

The convoys, which are still going on, have been in the works for nearly six months now.  Have they even gotten any results besides weakening the entire country’s supply chain and bringing renewed interest in “piss jugs” to the forefront of the American zeitgeist not seen since “Trailer Park Boys”?

Fox News Animal Husbandry Correspondent Joe Barron explained the goals and achievements so far.

 “Those truckers are heroes.  They helped to clear roads of dangerous roadkill and wasted gas to prove a point.  Do they actually understand masks, pandemics, and viral biology?  Of course.  All of that is covered in trucking school.”

Only one trucker in the convoys was found to have a PHD in trucking.  The operator, Leo Tarred of Queef Gust Lake, Montana, unfortunately passed away last month from an infection caused by eating a syphalitic banana.

You never get tired of using this picture, do you?

Is Biden right in placing the blame on truckers for gas prices?  Is it Putin?  Who took my sausages out of the refrigerator and hung them from the ceiling fan?  We may never know the answers to these questions.  But we’ll keep pumping though the tears.