Elliot Taylor is a fine example of a strong, young American boy.  The small California home where he lives with his parents, older brother Michael, and adorable pyrokenetic younger sister Gertie, is neat and respectable.

That is is WAS, until two nights ago, when Elliot heard strange noises coming from outside by the tool shed.  I cursory investigation led to the sudden realization that an illegal alien was hiding there.

The visitor, who dubbed himself “E.T.” followed him into the house, and formed a friendship with the boy and his siblings.  But, as luck would have it, Mr. Big Government got involved, and that’s where it all went to shit.

In a mad-dash madcap race to find “E.T.” an acceptable communications device to notify his family of his whereabouts, both the boy and his “amigo” became gravely ill.  Both are currently in a laboratory facility being waited on by professionals.

United States Secretary of Glowing Fingers Joe Barron says that the only way to fix both is to encourage ET’s people to come and deport him properly.

“He has no reason to be in this country, and that’s the God’s honest truth.  I don’t care how many bicycles he can make fly or how quick he can heal dead chrysanthimums.  He needs to be gone.  America is full.”

But is it so full that we need to sacrifice Elliot and others like him?  Small, white, fragile?  We may never be sure.  Except for the fact that Biden just left the border wide open.

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