Teen Shot By Old Man Has a Criminal Record

Will wonders never cease?  Just when you thought you knew the whole story, cut and dry, evidence creeps in that makes you see a whole nother side.

Just last week, we heard the unfortunate tale of Andrew Lester, who, when 16-year old black teen Ralph Yari mistakenly went to his home to pick up his brother, shot him the head through his front door, without any warning or notice.  Of course, if he had given some kind of notice, like, “I’m going to shoot you in the head, ni@@er boy”, it would have been a different story.

Although preliminary investigations by police indicate that there was a racial aspect to the shooting, the boy, after being shot again while outside, who has miraculously recovered, only two charges have yet been filed.

Missouri police chief Joe Barron shed some light on their findings in the case so far.

“This Ralph Yari kid, whose street name was ‘Phunky Brewster’, is actually a known fentanyl dealer that we’ve been tracking for some months now.  Now that we have him in custody, thanks to Mr. Lester’s quick thinking, we’ll find out his source.”

Lester, for his part, is 83 years old and had little idea who it was he shot.  He says he has the right as an American to blast any ‘black person’ he sees fit to.

“When I got my gun, I was always just itching to murder someone, especially a ni@@er,” he said from his 4X4 prison cell.  “So I did.  What’s the problem?  I mean, this is ‘Merica.”

So it is, sir.