Garth Brooks Owes $61 Million in Back-Taxes

Being a country music superstar isn’t really all that hard.  All you have to do to cut a hit album is make a bunch of songs with a twangy hook and some lyrics about pickup trucks and lost loves, and you’re in moneyland.

That’s pretty much the story of master of the huckleberry strings Garth Brooks.  For nearly 50 years, he’s survived and flourished with this recipe.  But here is a price.

If you were thinking “the government”, good thought.  That’s who Brooks now owes his soul to, to the tune of, what did I write in the headline, 61 million dollars?  Yes.  That much in back taxes.

Now cue all the conservatives who either don’t pay ANY taxes, or pay the lowest rates as the oldest boomer earners, with their outrage.  Prepare for the usual “just like Reverend Al Sharpton”! comments, even though he’s already paid years ago.

Amd nevermind that this is a satire story and isn’t true.  Hell, you should know by now that after we really hit it big back in the day, now about 70% of internet shit isn’t true.  And yet, because the Trump folk are stupider than Andy Dick at an N.W.A. concert, it still works.

So, bearing in mind the spirit of the Great Joe Barron and the mindset of this network, go ahead and share this delightful nonsense about Garth.  It’s killer.  Thanks.