Anheuser Busch refuses to pay transgender influencer Dylan Mulvaney, and now she’s suing them.

The controversial internet sensation was supposed to earn about $700K from the Bud Light partnership, which is now defunct.

“They still have an obligation to pay,” said Mulvaney, “it’s not my fault they caved to bigotry and bailed.”

Mulvaney’s attorney, Thomas Bagger, says the punitive damages alone bring the case to an easy $7 million. “They owe my client at least that for the emotional toll this whole thing has taken.”

The legal department at Anheuser Busch says the company has no intention of paying Mulvaney a dime. “They were bamboozled,” said attorney Joe Barron, “they were led to believe this person could increase sales. Instead, they lost billions, fired a bunch of people, and got disinvited to Oktoberfest.”

Our own legal mind, Sandy Batt, says both the company and the influencer have valid arguments. “Mulvaney couldn’t have known about the Kid Rock variable,” she said, “just like Anheuser Busch couldn’t have possibly predicted how stupid the MAGA base truly is.”

It sounded like she insulted us a bit, patriots, but in essence, she’s correct. We’re morons boycotting everything with a rainbow on it in the era of Pride Capitalism. Of course this nonsense was aimed at us. God Bless America.



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