CNN’s anchors are sometimes woefully underpaid, as per the latest ratings book.  If your show isn’t bringing them in, you’re going to have to find something else to contribute to the bills.

That’s what leads us to the exclusive bust, where ALLOD’s crack reporter Joe Barron discovered none other than Don Lemon Tonight’s own namesake at Prager University in Northern California, in his second job, teaching Critical Race Theory classes.

Barron cornered the dusky gay celebrity host in a hallway by drinking fountain and asked him what was up.

“Hey, Joe.  I was just heading out to get a cup of coffee in the school cafeteria.  They have the best coffee here.  I’m not a teacher or anything, no way.  This is all just a big misunderstanding.”

But is it?  When accosted, Lemon was wearing a bright orange badge labelled: “Staff”, and carried a folder and a textbook under his arm that read: “The Black Experience in America”. Barron pushed on and asked him to explain.

“Oh, the badge?  Uh yeah.  You have to have one of these to use the school pool.  I was diving earlier.  I’m a diver.  It’s a lovely pool.  Excuse me, I’m going to be late for my clas-…classic caramel mocha.”

He may deny it, but it’s pretty cut and dry that Lemon is teaching CRT.  Just like the headline said.  Good lord, will the taters buy this?  Probably.  They’re the dumbest people on earth.

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