Swimmer Lia Thomas made waves last year when she smashed every NCAA swimming record imaginable, stealing the Women’s National Championship from more than 1600 hard-working athletes.

After a lengthy investigation, the league has decided to revoke Thomas’ title, strip her of those records, and forward her to the Indiana State Attorney for possible fraud charges.

“There were some questionable test results,” said NCAA President Joe Barron, “results we can’t ignore. It would seem that we may have been misled.

The tests in question were part of the standard league battery for transitioning athletes. They tested everything from hormone levels and performing enhancement drug use to cognitive reasoning and found Thomas was no longer eligible for league play. or awards.

Her hormones were in line and there was no evidence of PEDs, said Barron, “but on the cognitive reasoning exam she stumbled at the question “what is a woman,” and again when asked if she considers herself woke. We can’t have that sort of uncertainty representing the league.”

You can’t, patriots. Especially with Donald Trump coming back to the White House. The country is done with wokeness and wants it over with. And we couldn’t agree more. It’s time America became America again. Whenever that was. God Bless…America.

14 Comments

  1. Joe

    Hmmm, amazing that this goofy website is the only one with this false story. I guess it will work on most of the morons you cater to.

    • Dominic sack

      Hey boomer go look up satire

      • MABEL JOHNSON

        HE KNOWS THAT THIS IS SATIRE! LOL

  2. Stephen C. Mathisen

    No source is cited, and I can find no corroboration anywhere. I am left believing that this is fake news.

    • J

      Do you…know what site you’re on? Someone help the poor confused boomers.

      • MABEL JOHNSON

        HIS HELMET ISNT WORKING, YULP !!!!

  3. Steve

    who some say is a “he,”

    But you’re done with wokeness?

    Cmon….

    Its simply a man, stop even toying with these notions..

    • MABEL JOHNSON

      HE IS SMART, NOT A DUMMY WHO GOT THEIR BRAINCELLS SENT TO GUATAMALA BAY !!!!

  4. Don L. WOOD

    Great article! (Only one thing. I hope you’ll follow the protocol of warning your reader when you’re going to use an acronym. Too few “writers” these days have either never learned or don’t follow the protocol like this: I am on AO (Acronym OVERLOAD)! Please say what your acronyms stand for. The small extra effort on your part is a stalled eclipse on your reader’s parts leaving us in the dark when I think your original desire was to inform? Thanks.

    • MABEL JOHNSON

      NCAA = NOW COOL AND AWESOME !!!!

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