Authorities in Santa Garafalantla, Michigan confirm that several species of small furry animals, most likely from Canada, were caught gathered together in a cave just outside of Buffalo, New York. The cave, know to the local Loagathanka Tribe as the secret passage to Niagara Falls and Lake Huron, is a common place for small animal gatherings.

Authorities say the animals may have been grooving with a pict, but as of now, there’s no way to know for sure. According to anthropologist Joe Barron, the most important part of that process will be determining which animals, if any, qualify as grooving, and what, exactly, “with a pict” might mean.

Wave upon wave of demented avengers marched cheerfully out of obscurity unto a dream, but the small furry animals weren’t swayed. One was seen taunting an avenger and calling him a sheep. The demented foot soldier replied, “He maketh me down to the lie.”

No charges have been filed as of yet, as the magistrate is busy setting the controls for the heart of the sun, but he did send a warning to the furry animal leader, Eugene, to be careful with that axe. The message may have been a metaphor for pigs on the wing.


God bless America.



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