There are plenty of reasons to not get vaccinated against the Trump Plague.  Pretty much all of them fall under the pretext of : “I’m a complete dummy, and I’m afraid and don’t want to.”

There’s the old fave, “I don’t know what’s in it.”  You don’t know what’s in goddamn Whopper either, do you, but trust me, millions of those get sold every day and slide down gullets into biological swamps of acid and miscellanea, with zero deaths reported.

There was this guy, but the truth was more embarrassing – autoerotic trampolining.

There’s “I’m allergic”, which applies to about .0001% of the population.  In other words, there’s as many “allergic” people as there are folks who can hit a tic tac with a bow and arrow at 2000 yards, so try yanking the other one, goober, it’s got bells.

Now a prevalent tale of Conservative rage is that doctors are refusing care to patients who aren’t vaccinated.  This is very obviously untrue thanks to the Hippocratic oath.  But this page isn’t the purview of the true, is it?  So, ergo, dead kid.

Little Joey Barron was only eleven.  He was a gifted child, in the second year of his Master’s degree study in Physics and halfway through his second devastating divorce when he contracted Covid-19 from a random prostitute.

“I’ll give you a no taste-buds discount.”

He bounced back from the virus, and made a full recovery.  However, tragically, days later he came down with queefeoplastic carcinomer, a rare disease in which the liver grows a horse face and begins to chew its way out of the torso.

Little Joey was chewed to death on September 15th, with only some shreds of clothing and a small plastic baby Yoda action figure remaining.  Horses are well known to be unable to digest The Child.

All of this happened because his parents wouldn’t vaccinate him.  Now he’s worm’s food.  That’s absolutely terrible.  I’m going to punish myself for this story by microwaving a pasta and then chomping it down.


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