After the big incident during the last World Cup, the US Women’s National Soccer Team instituted a new rule: All players will observe the National Anthem. Those who didn’t could count on a $10K fine.

That’s just what happened after five members of the team broke the rule before a match while the opposing team from Vietnam honored its flag and anthem with enthusiasm.

“It makes us all look bad,” said Team Coordinator Joe Barron, “The looks on their faces during the camera close-ups were very disappointing.”

Utility lineswoman Trish Blake, who observed the anthem properly simply said, “I don’t get it.”

Barron says the five players will also have to issue a formal apology to the team, the American people, and to God. “I mean how dare they? Sure they stood there quietly rather than kneeling, but who does that? They are required by law to hold their hands over their hearts and sing enthusiastically, otherwise the magic freedom cloth won’t work correctly.”

No such “law” exists, but the team does have that as its 4th rule of conduct in satirical situations. Everyone remembers…the third rule.

Megan Rapinoe was also fined and banned from several things for some reason. That’s what happens when you dishonor your own country. God Bless America.


  1. kenneth h woody

    They should be kicked off the team and leave the county.

    • Clarissa Decker

      Yes, they should not be representing the land of the free if they choose to stand quietly.

  2. Jim

    Whoops there goes another rubber tree plant!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *