Whoopi Goldberg started off this week’s View storyline right off the bat with strong and fawning admiration for Olympic swimmer Lia Thomas.

“She is the absolute face of good America,” she said proudly, waving her arms and standing up defiantly. “And she scares the hell out of those disgusting citizens who only care about what happens in our bedrooms.”

The announcement came to a huge round of applause from the in-studio audience as well as the other hosts.

Whoopi was, of course, referring to Thomas being a transsexual person.  As we well know, there are many bigoted and moronic old boomers still left who disagree.

One of those morons is Joe Barron, a forklift driver and engineer from Queefblastery, Pennsylvania.

“If’n she gots balls and a weiner, she ain’t a she, she a man.  Everybody knows that.  It ain’t no secret.”

Thomas, however, disagrees, after suffering through years of planned surgeries, public argument, and family problems.  She claims to have been in the wrong body type, and doesn’t take kindly to those raving against.

“It’s really very simple.  If you’re born with a cleft pallet?  You don’t just leave it and claim it’s ‘God’s will’. Siamese twins are separated.  Why?  So they can live happily and healthily.  Which is what I want.”

Thomas just doesn’t understand what hurts conservative Americans so much about their private parts that they need them perfectly reflected in the media and sports.  Perhaps they’re just sad and crushingly old.

10 Comments

  1. MABEL JOHNSON

    15 PEOPLE WANT PECKER ENHANCEMENT SURGERY, BUT ARE AFRAID THAT THEIR PECKER MAY FALL OFF !!!

  2. I used to be very happy to find this net-site. I wanted to many thanks this wonderful read!! I undoubtedly loved each component of it and I have you bookmarked to take a look at new stuff you weblog post.

  3. Reichman during our fertility treatment anyone under his care is in the very best hands and we would highly recommend him and Weill Cornell Tribeca to anyone who is in the process of looking for a fertility doctor paxil or priligy A method of regulating an immune response associated with a disease or disorder in a subject in need thereof, comprising administering to a subject in need thereof, a pharmaceutical composition comprising a therapeutically effective amount of aldesleukin wherein the regulatory T cells increase as compared to a control, inducing proliferation of regulatory T cells in vivo

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *