The government of Kenya has finally acknowledged that Barack Obama was, in fact, born in their country. After more than 15 years of silence, the African nation has at last come clean with the truth.
The development is being applauded across the country, as waves of Trump supporters began spreading the news. According to the leader of the Coalition Union National Trust Society, Art Tubolls, there’s is a win for conservatives:
“We’ve always known he was born in Kenya. Donald Trump told us his birth certificate was fake, and Photoshop specialist Brian Kolfage confirmed it. Now, with the admission by the government of Kenya itself, we can finally put the issue to rest and get on with petitioning to have him charged with treason.”
The Kenyan government has vowed to stay out of the discussion past acknowledging that the news is true. Spokesman for the Ministry of the Interior, Sandidinaka Battawanki, said the issue is dead as far as Kenya is concerned:
“We told people years ago that there was no discussion to be had, but they insisted on proving a point. The question at hand was simple to answer, and still they seem to have gotten it wrong for all those years.
“Yes, Barack Obama was born in Kenya. His son, the man who became President of the United States, was not. Not that the truth matters to imbeciles.”
There you have it, patriots, straight from their own government. Barack Obama was definitely born there, which means the birth certificate he’s been parading around since 2008 is a deep fake.
We can’t allow this to go unpunished, America. If we don’t stand behind these ridiculous conspiracies, they’ll never come true. Liberals will win. Now we just need to confirm the non-existent Benghazi stand-down order and the sale of all of our yellow cake to Russia.
Maybe we can finally have some justice.
