President Donald Trump is a master at many things. Real estate. Business. Politics. And now, shoes. Particularly, his new sneaker line.  These aren’t just any pair of kicks as young people say. These are special. And they’re incredible on the court.

Many of the leftist pundits laughed at the new offerings by the president. That was until they sold out and were put through rigorous testing on courts everywhere. Their performance was outmatched. Not even Nike’s famous Jordan line could hold up to these special shoes.

Michael Jordan and Nike were absolutely stunned. Not only did they sell out, but they sold out at $400 a pair. Jordan could only sell his for $150, tops. This was marketing genius folks. Donald Trump is an absolute boss.

Are these gaudy? Yes. Are they ugly? Also yes. Are they simply Chuck Taylor knock-offs simply spray painted with Rust-Oleum gold number 24? You bet your ass they are. And the Trump faithful bought them up

Joe Barron was one of the first buyers and tried them out. He wore them in court for his January 6 antics and immediately lost. “I thought these would help, but everyone laughed at me, realized I learned absolutely nothing and found me guilty.”

To counter the Trump shoe success, Nike execs were going to come up with an equally ugly and ridiculous shoe, and when they presented to them to higher ups, they were immediately fired and pummeled with the gaudy things.

When you see someone in them, it’s ok to point and laugh at them. We’re pretty sure it’s encouraged to do it.  These goddamned people will buy anything with his name attached to it and can’t figure out why they’re mocked constantly. We have an idea why. God bless America.


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